We’re all in the beginning process of recovery from the painful past 15 months. Because of the safety protocols most of us have been quarantined with our families. We’ve had to spend more time with our families than we would ordinarily spend…
Homeschooling, recreation, meals, entertainment, and all the other activities. Hopefully, our children have taught us much in the time we’ve been sequestered together; but more importantly, they’ve shown us what we have and have not taught them.
My father passed away in September 2019, and I’m never going to forget that date or the time. It’s indelibly tattooed on my brain and my heart and will forever be. I didn’t always agree with my father; but, his opinion meant the world to me, and though he wasn’t always right, his intentions were pure. I always knew he wanted the best for me, and that was a blessing. He possessed a God-fearing spirit that always pointed “True North,“ even when he got turned around (which wasn’t often, but it happened).
A father’s presence in the lives of their children during the formative years has a seismic effect on their character and most often determines the outcome of their future. I shudder to think what my life would’ve been without the firm, steadfast guidance that my father provided throughout my life. Have I ever gotten off track? I most certainly have. I believe that life is a series of lessons and those lessons are our blessings. We may not consider those lessons and the resultant blessings to be of value; however, there will come a time in your lives where the true value will be revealed.
Fathers teach your children the difference between ruthless ambition and developing character. Model respect and love for your children by respecting and loving your parents and yourselves. Instill in your children the importance of knowing where they come from; and, they’ll always be able to identify who they are and find their own true north. Allow them to make their mistakes and failures; and, they’ll handle their successes gracefully. Teach them the truth with patience and understanding; and, they’ll be honest. Show them how to be obedient sons and daughters by being a dedicated father. Your presence in their lives will be invaluable, immeasurable, irreplaceable, and forever enduring. Your sons will learn from you how to treat the women in their lives as they observe your treatment of their mothers and other women. Your daughters will learn how they’re to be treated by men and will learn to honor and respect the men in their lives. Your children‘s respect for themselves and humanity will be the lasting result of the respect they see reflected in your relationships with their mothers, your mother, and others you encounter throughout your life’s journey. Teach them responsibility and compassion by being responsible, being kind, and showing empathy to others. Teach your children to always strive to do better; but, remember that doing their absolute best is what’s most impressive. Instill in your children a spirit of fearlessness and the strength of humility. Teach your children to be brave, but not foolish. Teach them the path of least resistance isn’t always the right path, though it may appear the easiest. Teach them to respect authority and to challenge wrong in a manner that leaves everyone with their dignity intact. Most importantly, whatever your belief system, make certain your children share a relationship with the Creator. It’s been the single most important relationship that I’ve developed along with my parental bonds.
I remember the last meal I prepared for my dad. The memories of the deep sense of satisfaction and the intense pleasure that I experienced will forever be in my heart. I can’t help but smile each time I reflect on that moment in time. “You make a pretty good burger. You just need to slice them onions a little thinner, and you don’t need so much meat on them patties; but, these are good burgers,” said my father. I remember the last time we dined out just dad and me. This was huge because dad wasn’t a restaurant person. Myself, on the other hand, being a self-proclaimed foodie, chose one of the most bougie eateries in Chestnut Hill. I observed my elderly father as he delighted the complete joy I found in what would be our last evening dining out. It’s memories like these that continue to fuel my spirit and commitment as life goes on. I’m a better me not solely because of my dad, but because he was an integral part of my life and continues to be even in death.
The truly lasting gifts are in the lives of our children and their children. Embrace those gifts, rejoice in those gifts and pass those gifts on to future generations, creating a legacy for the future. Fathers celebrate your children, and children celebrate your fathers.
No, it’s obvious by my gender that I’m not anyone’s father, but I am my father’s daughter. This is his legacy in me. Happy Father’s Day!
